The cricketer was proud of his progress as a batsman and invited
his mother-in-law along to watch him play, hoping to impress her.
At the crease, he turned to the wicket-keeper and said 'I'm anxious
to do well and really hit this ball. That's my wife's mother over there.'
'Don't be silly,' said the wicket-keeper.
'You'll never hit her at two hundred yards.
The captain of a team says to the Umpire,
"My players want to know if there is a penalty for thinking."
The Umpire says, "No."
The captain says, "Well we think you're an asshole, then."
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